Sweeping up, Part 3 of 6

We've seen a ton of movies in 2011, reviewed a bunch of them, and yet we still have so many that we never talked about. There's plenty of reasons as to why we don't review certain movies; sometimes we're lazy, sometimes we don't have much to say that tons of other sites haven't said already, and sometimes we just get tired of sounding negative.

So with 2012 rapidly approaching, we're going to take a quick look at some of the movies of 2011 that we've ignored.

These are going to be quick and fairly to the point, although in all fairness, our points may suck. Then again, our points seldom suck.

Red, White & Blue- We caught this one way back at the beginning of the year, and even though we liked it, we never reviewed it. This is an example of one that we forgot about, so shame on us.

RW&B is the story of Erica; a slutty, emotionless void of a woman who will band anything she comes across. Sure, she's got her reasons for being like that, but it doesn't make it right! (just kidding, we love sluts.)

When she meets Nate, a skanky drifter and ex- military wetwork guy, she begins to see what being cared for is all about. Unfortunately for both of them, a gang bang gone wrong is about to make things go from depressingly bad to violently worse...

RW&B starts off slow and ends with a crazy bang, so to speak, and all the while the whole thing is covered in a nasty film of dysfunction and despair. It doesn't get truly horrific until the end, but once the horror kicks in, it's a tough one to endure.

The Master Says- B RW&B is a sad story that makes you feel kinda grimy for watching it. It's about sad people that go through some creepy things, and none of them escape unharmed. Amanda Fuller and Noah Taylor turn in great performances that make you feel for their characters even when they're up to their own kinds of shady business. If you like it real and gritty, this movie is one to check out.

ChromeSkull: Laid to Rest 2- Not as good as 2009's Laid to Rest, this sequel still delivers on the blood and gore that helped make the original into a cult hit.

The story here is basically the same as it was in part 1; the bloodthirsty ChromeSkull slices and dices his way through a bunch of sexy young people, because he's a sociopath.

What makes part 2 a bit different, is that it shows how ChromeSkull has a "team" of helpers in his corner. It all feels kinda Military in a way. Brian Austin Greene and the ever-hot Danielle Harris are his main Chromies, and they're just about as twisted as he is.

The blood flows very freely in this one. It's a gory, messy mess of a gory mess, and we're not exaggerating. It's worth seeing for the "spinning blade" scene alone. That was truly awesome.


The Master Says- B If you like slasher flicks, this is a movie you'll most likely love. It's not as smooth and straightforward as its predecessor, and feels too over complicated at times, but in the end it delivers the crimson goodness, so all is forgiven. Also, it's always good to see Danielle Harris on screen, and she's especially cute and nasty in this one.

Attack the Block- I hate Chavs. In the U.S., Chavs are known as Wiggers (not the nicest name you can call someone, but they seem to like it.) You know, the average young, dumb white kid who thinks he's Eminem, wears his pants around his ass and talks like he was raised on the means streets of Compton? Well, the annoying antics of the Chavs was nearly enough to make me stop watching ATB... but I'm glad I didn't.

Attack the Block is all about a bunch of 12 year old British Eminem wanna-be's who run around robbing innocent people because they're like a gang or something. Things get interesting when a bunch of bad ass looking alien dogs appear and start killing people. Naturally, it's up to the thugs to save "da block" from the alien invasion.

This was a fun movie. The aliens looked awesome, sort of like some dark matter dogs with crazy eyes. Once they stopped being annoying, the kids were pretty cool and stood their ground like pro's.

The Master Says- A- If you like your horror all full of Sci-Fi, then why haven't you seen this movie? If I had to compare it to something, it would have to be along the lines of Tremors meets Battle:LA. Great Britain has been turning out some great genre flicks as of late, and this one might be the one with the highest fun factor. Giver 'er a spin and enjoy.


Part 4 is on tha way, Guv...